Secrets dating older men
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That he hadn’t loved anyone as much as me since his . Here I was looking for my first no-strings fling, and Mr. The bottom line is, I was really fortunate that he was so good to me at a point where some really bad things could have happened.
Years later, he's turned those thoughts and advice into a book "Women Have All the Power, Too Bad They Don't Know It." Just Because it Glitters Doesn’t Mean It’s Gold Don’t be impressed by the unimpressive.Up until then, I’d only had two real boyfriends–both of them were super sweet and so good to me–but both of those relationships were so serious.I wanted to finally date someone just for fun–just to go out and make out and have it not be this whole dramatic epic romance.Over the years, I’ve looked back on those few months with him and although I totally understand why I was into it, and what I was looking for in that relationship–I still can’t quite understand what was in it for him (of course, besides my sparkling personality and drop-dead looks–I kid! Obviously I can’t tell you not to date an older guy after telling you a story like mine–but if you are, or if you’re thinking about it, just make sure he’s really respectful of you, that you never feel forced into anything, and that your friends or family know about him and know where you are. I don’t have any regrets, and I don’t want you to, either. He was really popular in the club scene, so a ton of people knew him (or at least knew of him)–but a lot of people worried about me being with him, and not just because they didn’t like me dating an older guy! He’d been married and divorced already, was a recovering alcoholic, was known to do drugs, and it was rumored he’d slept with just about every girl in town.
I knew all of this, and the truth is, that’s why I wanted to date him.
I thought with this guy, it definitely wouldn’t be. He was exciting in a totally different way than the boys I’d dated before.
Looking back, I definitely put myself in what could have been a scary situation.
Dangerous had turned into a big, mushy “I want a commitment” puppy dog. This was way more than I was looking for–and more than I could handle. A lot of guys who date girls that much younger than them are predators.
Luckily, I already had plans to leave The States and study abroad that September, so I had an easy out. I know girls who’ve dated much older guys and been completely taken advantage of.
Instead of those flags just sitting there while you ignore them, let me wave a few of them for you. If your man wears more than one ring per hand, more than one bracelet per wrist, and more than one necklace per neck — RED FLAG. If he is always the one who’s overdressed for the occasion — RED FLAG. If your man is constantly spending money on you without regard to price (i.e., clothes, trips, jewelry) and he can’t afford it — RED FLAG. If your man constantly asks to “hold” some money or expect you to pay while on dates — RED FLAG. If he approaches you with a flattering, yet rehearsed line — RED FLAG. If he says he has a job but can’t articulate exactly what it is he does for a living— RED FLAG. If he talks about himself more than he inquires about you — RED FLAG.